Jack-Caine Silverman

markers, pens, whiteout, normal paper, OCD, ADD, transsexuality, sociopolitics, music, poetry, a pencil, movies, stories, romance, lunacy, stage-hogging, hyperbole, mystery. that is what i use to make art.

. . . . I’m gonna make this brief, cause a buncha comic-book readers aren’t gonna last reading a whole unillustrated bunch o’ paragraphs. I’m onna those people that, if you caught me walkin’ around somewhere, and you knew I did this art, you’d think “Yeah. I shoulda guessed.” Then I’d say something and you’d think “WTF, THIS is the artist??” There you have it. The artist. I pretty much look like onna my comic book characters. Considering you like my art, you probably would like me. Well too bad, I’m anti-social, remember? All graphic novelists are introverts. I’d probably avoid talking on the phone with you, IMing you, or meeting you somewhere. I’d make you do all the work, or else I’d just go by “old-fashioned” e-mail. You’d have to come to MY house or pick ME up and take me somewhere. A good reason for that, in the first place, is, ya know, I can’t drive. I don wanna drive. Sorry. It’s scary.

. . . . I’m influenced by industrial music. The song that started my working on this story in 7th grade was Apoptygma Berserk’s “Kathy’s Song”, the Ferry Corsten remix. I felt into the world of electronic music.

. . . . K that was the intro. I’m gonna write a summary of my whole friggin life. I hate it when people expect these. I only have so much time, ya know? And ya think I’d know it so well by now, I’d be able to just spew it out without much thought, but uh– ‘fraid not. Lemme come up with some stuff that makes me sound like a helluva world dictator. Er somethin.

Birth: I was borne female. That was one buttload of a mistake. I was also borne with a pencil in my hand.

Pre-pre-school: I was a very serious little kid that already had sarcasm at age four, and liked to come up with BS just to get the camera on me. I hogged the camera like mad. Liked diapers too much, and wished I could wear ‘em all my life cause they’re so convenient. You’ve got a removable toilet on your butt at ALL times.

Pre-school: I started makin’ comics. I punched some girl in the face cause I pretty much wanted her to shut up n lemme alone. My mom kinna hateder too, so I was pissed when I got put in time-out.

Elementary: I discovered I’d been had at birth. I wasn’t supposed to be female, god dammit. I cut off my hair in 3rd. In 4th, my writing skills were recognized. In fifth grade, I began piano lessons, and started composing my own music. Then I found out I was pretty much doomed to draw.

Middle School: I had no friends, cause I was pretty much a nutcase. I didn’t find out I had OCD til later. Tried to be a girl, and that felt really fake, but it lasted a while. I discovered my affinity for acting and costumes.

High School:

9th: Went out with a very manipulative psycho bastard who left a few scars on my brain. It was 9 months of hell. I found out I had OCD and ADD. Fun with medication.

10th: Then I had a buttload more months of hell after this guy broke up with me (cause I wouldn’t give up my virginity and do what he wanted). The second batch of hell was a result of someone else who left my brain more scars. I found out I was bi. Not trendy bi, but serious bi. I was still pretending to be a girl, but it was fading. I hated the manipulative psycho bastard so much, that I figured I wasn’t attracted to men and said I was a lesbian. I split up from hellish experience number two, and gave up tryinna be a girl. I faced who I am, and I’m holdin’ strong. I’m a man.

11th: I was accepted into the High School for Performing and Visual Arts, where I met my current best friends. I went out with a strange vamperic masochist, and that lasted way too long. She passively dumped me over a long period of time, and I still don’t know why. Finally I realized I was never just attracted to girls, but to gay men as well. I had just been in denial. Gay men are damn sexy. Hold me back.

12th: After failing to get together with one of my best gay friends, I gave up, went on , and found the best boyfriend in all existence. I walked six miles to meet that kid, and it was worth it. I found out I have acute acid reflux and must also take meds for that. I lost my virginity on my 18th birthday, and found out my medication has the ability to make sex the most ineffective act of pleasure on the planet. After struggling so much with different cocktails of medication, I dropped the meds for ADD (they made me feel bad) and OCD. I had forgotten what sensation, emotion, and creativity was like, and now I feel wonderful! This is the highest time of my life, and I’ve never been happier. I’m older, and lead a healthier life, so being off OCD medication is much easier to deal with. My ADD will never go away, so that’s the only downfall. Dropping my meds led me to be productive in my art once again. That’s what got me writing what you see right here.

Age: 18

Sex: FTM

Name: Jack Caine

Birthplace: San Antonio, Texas

Location: Houston, Texas

Interests: Drawing, writing, tearing machines apart, war, psychology, music for the keyboard, ...sexuality, graphic novels, acting, costume, modeling, photography, film, the past eras, languages

I get my mits on any media I can. Mainly it's twisted/villainous character-acting that thrills me more than anything, but I also produce a lot of hands-on work: photography, my graphic novel (every inch of it), writing, electronic music.... If I could hook up with someone, I'd go nuts making a film. I am driven by the need to perform my mind, to turn my thoughts into some form of reality. Music and the cinematic/theatrical have always influenced me, fueling my brain's own never-ending movies. I record them in different ways, hoping every product is alluring, with the near-absolute power to seduce the audience. No matter the image, sound, or story, I desire for the viewer to mentally create new scenes out of the feeling mine gave them. I have always portrayed things as not quite how they seem to most people. I hope that once someone has witnessed my portrayal, the thing will never again be seen in the same light. Channeled artistically, I possess my victims with pure excitement, previously unfelt or not understood. That is the obscura mysterium (the mystery of darkness) of my mind that peaks one’s curiosity in a manner that may confuse or disturb them with satisfaction.

i was the lovely prom prince of houston's alternative prom.

i won deviant art's "daily deviation" award for a controversial piece called "bush baby".