I Used To Stand Tall, Now I Stand Brighter (2020) 图画 由 Anton Terziev

Anton Terziev’s "I Used To Stand Tall, Now I Stand Brighter" (2020) is a striking and visionary exploration of identity, power, and transformation. The piece, a pencil drawing with silver oil on 300lb Fabriano Artistico paper, depicts UFC female fighter Megan Anderson in a pose of strength and defiance, arms flexed as she stands confidently. Through this powerful portrait, Terziev delves into the realms of feminism, masculinity, and the political undercurrents that define the modern conception of gender, strength, and empowerment.

At first glance, Anderson’s muscular form stands out as a testament to the discipline, strength, and grit inherent in combat sports. Yet, Terziev's inclusion of silver oil alongside pencil marks introduces an ethereal and reflective quality to the drawing, elevating Anderson’s presence beyond mere physicality. The shimmering silver highlights evoke a sense of light, as though Anderson’s form transcends traditional notions of power, embracing a new definition of strength that is not bound by gendered stereotypes. The title, "I Used To Stand Tall, Now I Stand Brighter," mirrors this transformation. It suggests not only a shift in personal identity but also a more profound societal change in how strength and femininity are perceived. Anderson does not simply stand tall in the traditional sense; she radiates, embodying a brilliance that defies conventional expectations.

The focus on Anderson’s tattoos and muscular physique brings the artwork into direct conversation with themes of masculinity and its fluidity in the context of women’s roles in combat sports. Historically, women in athletics, particularly in combat sports like UFC, have been compelled to either emulate traditional masculine traits (dominance, aggression, strength) or minimize them to preserve a more “feminine” identity. By portraying Anderson’s tattoos—often symbols of personal identity and rebellion—Terziev subverts these expectations. The tattoos are not ornamental; they are part of the fighter’s narrative and a visual declaration of her defiance against the conventional image of femininity.

Terziev’s use of shading and linework further emphasizes the dynamic tension between femininity and masculinity. Anderson’s powerful stance, with muscles defined and highlighted, embodies a form of masculinity traditionally reserved for male athletes. Yet her expression—confident, serene, and full of agency—conveys a rejection of the notion that power must always be linked to traditional masculinity. The contrast between the roughness of the physical form and the soft silver undertones suggests that femininity is not passive, nor should it be confined to passive spaces. The linework itself oscillates between softness and precision, mirroring how women in sports must navigate these two opposing forces of societal expectations: the softness of traditional femininity and the rawness of physical strength.

The silver oil’s reflective quality is not just an artistic choice but a symbol of the intersection between visibility and recognition. Anderson, as a fighter, exists within a space often dominated by men, yet her strength allows her to shine and redefine the contours of what a female athlete can represent. By standing “brighter,” she transcends traditional limitations, embodying a strength that is not just physical but intellectual and cultural. The juxtaposition of silver highlights on her form can also be interpreted as a metaphor for how women in sports must constantly be illuminated and celebrated for their achievements, often against a backdrop of systemic erasure or undervaluing.

The political implications of Terziev’s work are layered with sharp irony. On one level, the artwork presents Anderson as a heroic figure, embracing her power and subverting traditional gender roles. Yet, the very need for such a portrayal highlights a larger cultural issue: the fact that women in sports are still forced to fight against entrenched gender norms. While the artwork celebrates her as a symbol of empowerment, it also subtly critiques the societal structure that requires women to prove their worth in an environment historically dominated by men. Anderson’s muscles and tattoos are not just markers of her physical achievements—they are a statement about the ongoing need to challenge a system that continuously seeks to define what women “should” be.

Ultimately, Anton Terziev’s "I Used To Stand Tall, Now I Stand Brighter" is a multifaceted exploration of the transformation of gendered power. By focusing on UFC fighter Megan Anderson, Terziev turns the conventional narrative of strength on its head, proposing that true power lies not in conforming to traditional ideals of masculinity but in redefining them altogether. Through meticulous technique, visionary use of materials, and poignant thematic exploration, the drawing challenges us to reconsider our assumptions about feminism, masculinity, and the politics of visibility. Anderson’s powerful image is a radiant example of how women in combat sports are not merely surviving within a masculine framework—they are actively reshaping it to reflect a more inclusive, empowered future.

Part of NTFL series (2019-)

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